Dianetics: The Original Thesis - Chapter One

Well, it's time for us to finally take the plunge and lose the cherry that we call our sanity. Here we go...

SUMMARY

There are several axioms within the study of Dianetics...

SURVIVE! - This is the key command given to all things.

THE PURPOSE OF THE MIND IS TO SOLVE PROBLEMS RELATING TO SURVIVAL.

THE MIND DIRECTS THE ORGANISM, THE SPECIES, ITS SYMBIOTES, OR LIFE IN THE EFFORT OF SURVIVAL.

THE MIND, AS THE CENTRAL DIRECTION SYSTEM OF THE BODY, POSES, PERCEIVES AND RESOLVES PROBLEMS OF SURVIVAL AND DIRECTS OR FAILS TO DIRECT THEIR EXECUTION.

THE PERSISTENCY OF THE INDIVIDUAL IN LIFE IS DIRECTLY GOVERNED BY THE STRENGTH OF HIS BASIC DYNAMIC.

INTELLIGENCE IS THE ABILITY OF AN INDIVIDUAL, GROUP OR RACE TO RESOLVE PROBLEMS RELATING TO SURVIVAL.

The rest of the chapter elaborates on the meaning of these axioms, which I will further discuss in the following section.

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As soon as you begin reading, L. Ron throws his first brainwashing curveball. He never fails to mention that Dianetics is supposedly thoroughly researched, but always fails to support proof that he has, indeed, done any work. For example, the first sentence is this...

Dianetics is a heuristic science built upon axioms.

Here's where the brand spanking new glossary by the Golden Age of Knowledge comes in. Heuristic is defined as "using experimentation, evaluation or trial-and-error methods; involving investigation and conclusions based on invariable workability". Of course, this leaves a lot to be desired, such as a little thing called proof. Next, there's this little gem which once again confronts the disclaimer in the book's very own cover.

The only claim made for these axioms is that by their use certain definite and predictable results can be obtained.

"A claim? But L. Ron Hubbard did no such thing! This is fact!"

Is Xenu gonna have to choke a thetan?

Moving on, Hubbard talks about how Dianetics works in its organization and axioms, stating this in the process.

There are no principal sources and where a practice or a principle is borrowed from some past school, the connection is usually accidental and does not admit andy further use or validity of that school. Dianetics will work, and can only be worked, when regarded and used as a unity. When diluted by broader applications of older practices, it will no longer produce results. To avoid confusion and prevent semantic difficulties, new and simplified terminology had been used and is used only as defined herein.

Translation: "Oh, this is all my doing. I didn't steal traits of Dianetics from Freud or any others of the evil psychs. And if you do it any other way than what I tell you, you fail at life. And let's make up some new words as we go along! Engram, preclear, A=A=A=A=A..."

Hubbard explains that Dianetics is a family of sciences, but doesn't go further in explaining anything more than what he lays out in this book, which is the form of Dianetics that cures psychosomatic ills, or sicknesses caused purely by the mind. He doesn't enter into it here, but Scientology believes that %70 of all diseases is psychosomatic - including AIDS, according to Jenna Elfman.

Hubbard divides knowledge into two sections, Knowable and Unknowable. Here lies a cunning piece of work by Hubbard; he defines Knowable as all the information relevant to their studies, and unknowable as information not relevant. Not only does this place a major focus on Dianetics itself (and take it away from matters like family and friends), but it also attempts to seperate itself from Scientology itself by stating...

By thus splitting the broad field of thought, we need not now concern ourselves with such indefinites as spiritualism, deism, telepathy, clairvoyance or, for instance, the human soul.

I've done a bit of reading ahead in regards to Scientology's beliefs, and the thetan, or soul, is regarded in L. Ron's earlier works as the concept of "I", or one's self, which is discussed later in this book. Caught you again, Scientology.

So for all of the knowable data, our first axiom of Scientology applies. The first axiom is the now-infamous command, "SURVIVE!" According to Hubbard, by knowing this as the basic command of the universe, one can visualize it as the purpose of all energy of the universe.

The various kingdoms have this as their lowest common denominator, for animals, vegetables and minerals are all striving for survival.

I didn't know rocks strive for survival. I thought they were just...well, rocks.

So as the various minerals formed colonies, the colonies came together to form an aggregation, each colony taking on a different role for the greater good of the rest, and pretty soon they all became controlled by a central control system which would eventually become the mind. (That's funny; where does Xenu fit in all of this?) Since the mind is formed to control the aggregate body, and the goal of this body is survival, then the second axiom is "THE PURPOSE OF THE MIND IS TO SOLVE PROBLEMS RELATING TO SURVIVAL."

The greatest win in the goal of survival is living forever, "at its unimaginable extreme" as Hubbard puts it. The greatest failure is - of course - death. In between the two is simply existing, and there are many different amounts and variations throughout. (Seriously, where the hell is Xenu?) Hence, this forms a gradient from death to immortality, with success heading upwards and failure heading downwards. In order to achieve success, one has to solve problems and keep their assets around, or else face death. Thusly, "THE MIND DIRECTS THE ORGANISM, THE SPECIES, ITS SYMBIOTES, OR LIFE IN THE EFFORT OF SURVIVAL."

Taking a hint from Darwin, Hubbard proclaims that survival is the greatest test of an organism, and even if an organism's actions fail (Alright, I get it already; there is no Xenu in the Original Thesis. Wait for OT III.), it was still nonetheless motivated by the instinct to survive. Next axiom, please. "THE MIND, AS THE CENTRAL DIRECTION SYSTEM OF THE BODY, POSES, PERCEIVES AND RESOLVES PROBLEMS OF SURVIVAL AND DIRECTS OR FAILS TO DIRECT THEIR EXECUTION."

So in case you missed it, there's this contest of natural selection and we're part of it. Also, according to Hubbard, we're winning it on this planet. No seriously. See for yourself.

Man is the most siccessful organism currently in existence, at least on this planet. Man is currently winning in the perpetual cosmic election which possibly may select the thinker of the New Thought.

FINALLY WE GET SOME UFO JARGON. Not only is this incredibly creepy, it is also very much out of place in the context. At first we're talking about evolutionary history of the human mind, and now suddenly it's Xenu Time? And what is this "New Thought", anyway? Well, let's look it up in our handy-dandy glossary!

New Thought: literally, any of various philosophical and religious movements such as the New Thought movement (late 1800s) and its offshoots, holding that affirmative thought or the adoption of a favorable mental attitude results in beneficial changes in Man. Their workable optimisim was in contrast with the "old thought" of sin, evil and pessimistic resignation. Hence, "the thinker of the new thought," an individual or group that brings new, independent and constructive philosophic or religious insight or principles to Mankind.

Scientology deeply wants to disconnect Dianetics (pun intended, lulz) from its UFO-speak and religious status, but it's going to have a hard time if it keeps pulling stuff off like this. It's painfully obvious just reading the statement that something is not right about it fitting in with a "heuristic science".

Moving on, Mankind has evolved, and so has his mind, transforming into an 'analyzer', "which probably exists as his frontal lobe". You mean to tell me that you did all of this research, and you don't even know where the analyzer is? >_<>
The dynamic is variable from individual to individual or race to race.

That easily explains many of Hubbard's statements about black people ("Whuts'a mattah wid' you, hat?"), Chinese ("They smell of all the baths they didn't take...the problem with China is, there are too many chinks there."), and various others. They are inferior, therefore can't survive. Way to go, Mr. hubbard, you win our hypocrisy award!

So that gives way to the next axiom, "THE PERSISTENCY OF THE INDIVIDUAL IN LIFE IS DIRECTLY GOVERNED BY THE STRENGTH OF HIS BASIC DYNAMIC." And since each person's/race's success rate varies, we get the final axiom (Thank God and Raptor Jesus); "INTELLIGENCE IS THE ABILITY OF AN INDIVIDUAL, GROUP OR RACE TO RESOLVE PROBLEMS RELATING TO SURVIVAL."

Hubbard takes this opportunity to outline the 'fact' that wins toward survival are pleasurable, whereas failure isn't. Hence, according to him, pleasure is the sensation of winning, and likewise pain is failing. Then he throws another curveball.

For the purpose of Dianetics, good and evil must be defined.

Well, lucky for us, good and evil are impossible to define, so that means there is no Dianetics...wait...oh, God, he's going ahead anyway.

Good may be defined as constructive. Evil may be defined as destructive. (Definitions modified by viewpoint)

So wait a minute...if you must define good and evil in order to have Dianetics, yet these definitions must be modified by viewpoint, then that means each person must come up with their own version, meaning there is no unification, meaning that no one is following LRH the way he wants them to, meaning THERE IS NO DIANETICS.

Thankfully, we're done with this chapter, but we're far from done with the book. Having read it in itts entirety already, I can assure you that this is definitely a foreshadowing of what is to come. There are many segments of this book which are inaccurate and/or lulzy, but much of it is faked/forged/pulled out of his rear to such a degree that - if the reader weren't picky enough to notice the details - they would believe it. That's why Original thesis comes first on the list. Hubbard may have been a con man, and he may have become a psycopath in his later years, but nevertheless he was a complete genius, and he knew what he wanted so he used everything he could to get it.

Of course, what he wanted was money.

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TL;DR

Hubbard is a racist and pathological liar, yet an all-too-worthy adversary. Prepare the lazerbeams.

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Enturb user DontMindMe writes in with this.

Wow. Even the first sentence is wrong. "Dianetics is a heuristic science built upon axioms." One or more of the words "heuristic," "science," and "axiom" are being used incorrectly. Possibly all three. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on Dianetics, since it's his trademark, and he can do whatever the hell he wants with it.

Anyway, "heuristic" = "intuitive." As a noun, it means a rule of thumb. It does not mean what the Golden Age glossary says it means -- what they're defining is "empirical." Well, for more information about the word, here: http://www.answers.com/topic/heuristic Just so you don't get the wrong idea. Hey, it's like we're word-clearing! And now that I think about it, "heuristic science" is the definition of a pseudo-science, since it's based more on what seems to make sense and seems to work rather than any sort of rigorous examination.

Or maybe that's a bit too harsh.

Not at all, DontMindMe. Not at all.

Introduction to Dianetics: The Original Thesis

Let's start before the beginning.

There is a disclaimer on the very first page of the book, as soon as you open the cover. It's entitled "TO THE READER" and states...

This book is presented in its original form and is part of L. Ron Hubbard's religious literature and works and is not a statement of claims made by the author, publisher, or any Church of Scientology. It is a record of Mr. Hubbard's observations and research into life and the nature of man.

Neither Dianetics nor Scientology is offered as, nor professes to be spiritual healing, nor is any claim made to that effect. The Church does not accept individuals who desire treatment of physical or mental illness but, instead, requires a competent medical examination for physical conditions, by qualified specialists, before addressing their spiritual cause.

Let's play a game of "What's Wrong with This Picture?"

First of all, the book is NOT presented in its original form. In 2007, David Miscavige, the Chairman of the Board of the Religious Technology Center - essentially, the current Head of the Church of Scientology - authorized a dramatic overhaul of every book in the Basics collection, including this one. This means that the book I have is not the original representation of it. Scientologists would most likely argue that this is the book as Hubbard would want us to read it, but I'll get to that later.

Secondly, there's no evidence that the Church requires a medical exam like that before beginning, and even if they did, it'd be by their own staff under their own rules. Most of the time, they just randomly pick people off from the street. The rest of the points I'll come back to later on.

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Another page before the true beginning of the book is entitled "An Important Note", and is nearly duplicated in every book in the Basics series, in a few different forms. The essential meaning of this section is to say that you should be careful in not going past a word that you don't understand, lest you not understand the rest of the teachings afterwards.

This is L. Ron Hubbard's kinder way of saying, "You don't like the way I say this stuff? Eff you, it's your fault! You read past a term that I made up on the fly, and didn't take another minute out of your life to flip to the glossary in the back of the book, read the definition (which I also made up), go back to before you read the word, and then finish reading? No wonder you're a suppressive!"

There's also a section on glossaries; there are two glossaries in this book, one based on L. Ron Hubbard's terms, and one based on general words. This little blurb in the beginning replaces a similar one on footnotes. I think this is the only good thing I can say about the "Golden Age of Technology" revisions; having once tried to read the original Dianetics, there have been pages where there were only five lines in a paragraph, and the rest is filled completely with footnotes, and some of the footnotes were of the most abysmally simple things!

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The introduction is only a page long, and yet we can find plenty of inaccuracies. The introduction is written in 1948 (or rather that's the date given; I'm not trusting Hubbard's word even that far), and Hubbard spends a bit of time describing the events from 1932 to 1948 in gathering the information needed to form Dianetics. He starts working in 1932, discovers the Primary Law ("Survive!") in 1938, then proceeds to study it further until his wartime service begins.

At this point, Hubbard makes reference to "Certain experiences during the war", which is certain to be concluded as his infamous story of having been blinded in battle, being brought to Oak Knoll Hospital, and then using the powers of his discoveries to heal not just himself but four other wounded soldiers. This is, of course, utter bull; Hubbard's interim at Oak Knoll was due to ulcers, not enemy fire.

So Hubbard carries on research from 1945 onward, and things start piecing together in 1946. Via a "lump-sum disability compensation", he is able to refine the work even further. But wait; wasn't he able to cure himself? Why would he need disability compensation if he wasn't disabled? If the story was true, and he WAS blinded before curing himself, then that would nullify the need to get paid for the injury. Since the story ISN'T true, then I doubt the military would offer compensation to someone who got ulcers. (He was, by the way, dishonorably discharged from the US Military.)

So out of the past four years, he had twenty participants in his studies, and every one of them was apparently cured by his experiments. Notice how he never backs up his info by elaborating or giving references as to what happened. Very persuasive non-existant evidence, L. Ron.

Now let's thumb back to the introductory advisory paragraphs; "This book is...not a statement of claims made by the author, publisher, or any Church of Scientology...Neither Dianetics nor Scientology is offered as, nor professes to be spiritual healing, nor is any claim made to that effect."

Let's catch the Co$ in their little white lie, shall we? What follows is the concluding paragraph from the Introduction.

Dianetics has been found to successfully resolve migraine headaches, ulcers, arthritis, astigmatism, bursitis, stammering, glandular imbalance, asthma, allergies, and other psychosomatic ills. It has also successfully removed any compulsions, repressions, neuroses and psychoses to which it has been applied.

L. Ron Hubbard,
1948

Oh, God. I can hear the Office of Special Affairs (Scientology's own FBI) crapping themselves. Is this a claim? A claim made by their beloved L. Ron Hubbard? It IS! And it's only the first of many, as you will soon see.

Of course, this isn't a claim that it's "Spiritual Healing" either, because they profess that Dianetics is a Science rather than an official part of Scientology (when in reality the two are wound tighter than Tom Cruise and David Miscavige, and those two are TIGHT).

Which brings me to my final point. This particular edition of Dianetics: The Original Thesis was released in 2007, 21 years after the death of L. Ron Hubbard in 1986. Meanwhile, the original version was published in 1951, a year after the release of Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health and 35 years before his death. David Miscavige claimed that the book was missing materials due to the fault of either a transcriptionist or an editor, and that MSMH was the only book that came out the way LRH intended. Meanwhile, Original Thesis is advertised as being first handed around by LRH in manuscript form before being published.

Therefore, if LRH himself wrote this manuscript, and if he lived for thirty-five years after it were published without noticing anything, than there should be no reason for the Church to overhaul the book (or, considering the second point, any books) and force all the Scientologists to buy them AGAIN.

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[NOTE: TL;DR stands for "Too Long; Didn't Read"; this is a special summary section for those who decide not to read through the lengthy text above.]

TL;DR: Scientology and Hubbard have lied several times, and we haven't even begun to really read the book yet.